I woke up without a heartbeat.
But I remember we was just in the car deep,
Was at the light and got approached by a car thief.
He pulled out but didn't ask for no car keys
A loud noise without a voice
But im tryna scream out shit is not fair.
I can't tell you where im at or how i got here.
Surrounded by all white, maybe its just cloudy.
Escorted by to men who knew everything about me.
Both of em so strong, kept saying "hold on", feel like my souls gone,
Naked no clothes on.
I know this cant be my fate i scream wait as they drop me in front of a gate.
They left no trace, i could see my every breath like a cold day.
Stood before a man with no face, he said to me;
"Please don't make this any harder"
Who the fuck is you?
"My child, I am your father"
I only got one dad..
"Is that a fact to you, he left you when u was young,
I brought him back to you. your real close to heaven,
Few get to step in, now tell me what you've done to deserve to be let it in"
Look I'm far from a christian not big on religion
But I aint done too much wrong my entire time living.
Never killed never tried to, though I been lied to,
Was once suicidal, never read the bible.
I always been a care taker, try to nurse people.
At times it back fired hurt people hurt people.
Plus I never used your name in vein but you should know everything
I'm being asked to explain.
"I know you stole from your mothers purse"
You cant count that, that was way back when..
"It's still a sin"
But I was ten
"You robbed peoples stores"
Yea and you made me see jail
"But I also see you lay your hands on a female,
Sold drugs to parents, none of that was needed,
Abandoned your child, on every girl you cheated.
Done wrong to people that only want the best for you.
Any time you thought u were alone i was next to you"
When it come to baby moms god you gave me the worst one..
"But that was your second child Joe, u shoulda kept the first one"
I ain't have a job, ain't have a pot to piss in
"Look, i gave you a gift and u made the wrong decision.
Held on to resentments even in doing business.
I lead by example, I take forgiveness.
Your entry cannot be guaranteed.
Not when you live with anger, envy, greed, pride, sloth, lust even gluttony.
Everything you shouldn't if you'd want to join my company"
Look I'm only human i ain't perfect
"That I understand, when i take u out a jam you dont even think to worship
And when you do, you never talk about what you can do for me
Just what I can do for you
I blessed you with health, family and wealth
with all the blessing you've received you still always want help"
Yea there's been times in my life i needed help to make money
but why everything I love, you manage to take from me.
yet u stand there and question a nigga that tries hard and finds away
when u keep dealing him fucked up cards.
you make mistakes like me far as i can see i think is a mockery
whenever rich niggas win the lottery.
gave us bush twice god,
I hate to be rude but you let skinny niggas starve
give obese niggas food.
the nerve of you tellin me i dont deserve to stay here
when you gave us drugs and guns. you put aids here.
take a look at you, your ass is so cold hearted;
the hard shit is you bring babies in the world retarted.
I know most my actions will put me in a cell
but how you mad at me when you putting me through hell.
"See my child, you need grattitude. maybe just a sample.
I never give a person anything they cant handle.
dont tell me bout everything you had to go through
there's reasons for my actions even if I never show you.
kept trying with you, all you did was hurt me,
still gave you chances to prove that you was worthy.
and so I sat with you on the train, I asked you for change,
You kept calling me names.
You probably didn't notice I was the store clerk,
You put the gun to me got money for no work.
My child I know you have it in you to indeed stop.
This is not your final calling just a brief stop.
Hope you hear my words and understand.
so when I send you back you should be a better man.
look at life different, the next time we see each other,
they'll be no need for talk whenever we meet each other"